Get Your Glow Back – Episode 26 – Chloe Brotheridge
Today’s podcast episode is with the lovely Chloe Brotheridge, a hypnotherapist and anxiety expert. Chloe had some amazing advice to share with all of us to help combat anxiety and I hope you found it as useful and informative as I did.
What is anxiety:
- Anxiety is a feeling of unease, such as worry or fear, that can be mild or severe. Biologically, anxiety is when the body goes into fight or flight mode, this activates the adrenal response and can cause a lack of concentration, a pause on digestion and many other factors as the body pauses non-emergency systems to place all of it’s energy into the response.
- For many of us, we find it challenging to fully relax, hypnotherapy can place you in a very relaxed state that can allow you to be more receptive to the therapy.
Why is anxiety at epidemic levels now?
- The pace of life has made it harder to relax
- There is a pressure to ‘‘have it all, do it all, perfectly’
- We are an overprotected generation: haven’t necessarily experienced failure to know it’s okay to fail
- Usually linked to self esteem – not feeling good enough, imposter syndrome, struggling to express themselves at work etc. perfectionism
- Perfectionism: aiming for something impossible, seems to affect women more than men, could it be linked to what we are raised on, disney princesses, media messages
How can we become less anxious?
Be more present:
- Learning to be more present is a really valuable skill for managing anxiety.
- Anxieties are often about future events, we believe that by considering all outcomes we are somehow in more control but in reality, it only makes us less able to deal with things in the present.
- Think about what you have not what you don’t: realise you are enough, you have enough and you don’t need to always think you aren’t good enough
Set Boundaries for social media:
- airplane mode after 8pm
- try not to look first thing
- put phone in box with lid on less likely to distract you
- unfollow people who trigger negative feelings about ourselves
- take a break if its not making you feel good
- remember the exterior doesn’t tell the full story
- find the positive intention at the route of your comparison
Practice Self care and Exercise the Mindfulness Muscle
- Routines/rituals: practice a meditative practice that works for you.
- Chi gong : oldest form of tai chi, mindful movement, focus on expanding awareness and bringing it back can be a great form of alternative meditation,
- transcendental meditation
- Essential oils: rub lavender oil on palms and breathe in to calm
- learning to say no, ask yourself do I really want to do that or is it because I’m concerned if I don’t the other person will like me less
- Encourage a positive inner voice, would you speak to your friend like this? If the answer is no then don’t. We instinctively know it’s not helpful to be horrible to our friends so why is it any different for ourselves.
- As an exercise: write down over 24 hours what you have said to yourself and see whether you need to be kinder to yourself.
Combatting Social anxiety :
- imagine what could go right instead of what could go wrong
- The more you avoid social situations, the more you feed that the situation is dangerous and the bigger the problem seems. If you just try and go even if for a little bit you give yourself the chance to see it is not so bad
- Be kind to yourself, you aren’t alone
People Pleasing – The disease to please
- people pleasing takes away from you,
- Instead of helping relationships it harms them as it leads to you resenting others or burning out,
- Having never had our own needs met
What to do:
- Slow down and find out what you want
- There is s no way of controlling what people think of you so we may as well be ourselves and see who actually does like us.
- It is Better to be disliked for being you than being liked for someone you’re not.
- accepting yourself is the most important step to finding people who embrace us as we are
Where to find Chloe: